Monthly Archives: September 2014

Catching Fireflies On A Hot Summer Night

image
Think about the relationships we’ve formed as children. When we’ve played together for hours. Summer, with splashing hose water on each other, playing kickball and playing with dirt. Catching fireflies on a hot summer night.

We’d have balloon fights in our old neighborhood in the summers. We’d fill up our balloons with water and throw them at each other. The balloons would break, spilling water all over. We also had berry fights, our shirts filling up with red stains that just wouldn’t come out in the wash. We thought as children that our friends would be there forever. Somehow the sense of time is slower, and even the summers inbetween the school years were drawn out. The times we would watch scores of fireflies lighting up the night grass. Trying to catch some of them, trapping them under a jar and then letting them go. Catching fireflies was something we loved to do in the summers. Between hearing the crickets and fireflies at night, there was something comforting about it.

If you could think of a metaphor for how we define our relationships, what would it be? I would think of the fireflies we’d watch, flitting around, sparks flying in the freshly cut night grass. Watching them around us, admiring them, mesmerized by them. Trying to catch them. Trapping them under glass. Then releasing them so they wouldn’t die. And feeling sad when not seeing the sparks of their light anymore. Knowing how fleeting they are, yet how beautiful. Knowing they don’t last forever.

Isn’t it ironic that the most beautiful memories in our lives can also be the most fleeting?

All writings © TravelingThrill

Comments Off on Catching Fireflies On A Hot Summer Night

Filed under Broken Communication, Divorce, Marriage, Relationships, Vacation Time

Too Much Or Too Little Of That Sweet

sweetw

Life is sweet. Yeah, sometimes. I stumbled upon this poster when I stopped by Pinot Pallette located in Paradise Valley (Phoenix)  AZ. Its a great place where you can actually paint step by step with an instructor and drink wine at the same time. How good is that? Just a great place to get together and have some fun, and be artistic at the same time!

You know how sweets have too much sugar in them? How they taste good? But you can’t eat too much of them because you’ll gain weight? You get all relaxed and comfy, and the pounds start to roll on.

If there’s too much sweet in your relationship, you’ll get lax. If there’s not enough, you’ll crave for the sweets. And it goes full circle.

Is life sweet? Sometimes. Are relationships sweet? Sometimes.  Sometimes not. Sometimes they are bitter sweet, or downright bitter. Or salty and crusty. It just depends. You could be in a relationship for a long or short time, it doesn’t matter. It can become bitter or sour very quickly.

If you have been married for a long time, can your relationship be sweet? It can, however the repetitiveness and responsibilities of every day life can bring in sourness, which really isn’t always a bad thing. If you’ve been in a relationship for a short period of time but your significant other starts showing you lack of respect, the relationship will sour. Lack of respect is a big one, though, that needs to be dealt with.

I’ve been married twice. Each time there’s been a struggle with mutual respect, and with keeping the relationship alive. It takes work. If you let it slide, it might slide right off the map. I think lack of respect comes from taking that person for granted. It’s only human nature to assume, and if we don’t have to work on something, and if things just come to us, we get lazy. We’ll just reach for that sugary cupcake even if it’s not good for us. The sugary cupcake might be a lack of being in touch with yourself and stocking up on comfort food. It doesn’t have to be literally reaching for a cupcake, one could just be in denial about how things really are.

So your husband doesn’t look at you anymore, or he’s gone for a long period of time, or he’s not around to fix the weatherstripping around the house.

Delegate some responsibility. If your partner never cleans the house or does any chores, when both of you have a busy life, sit down and talk about it. Talk about how it feels to have to do everything yourself, cleaning the house, taking care of groceries, paying and organizing the bills. See if you both can share equally, or at least try to. If you don’t speak up, you won’t know if things can change. If your partner resists or is non communicative, make a note of it, and try again a different day. But try to talk to each other. Open up the communication channels. Cause if you don’t talk, you don’t communicate, your partner won’t know what bothers you, you won’t know what is bothering your partner, and communication is on a breakdown path.

Life is sweet, life is bitter, life is salty. It actually isn’t a bad thing, because having too much of that sweet isn’t a good thing either.

 

All writings © TravelingThrill, photo © TravelingThrill

sweetw

Comments Off on Too Much Or Too Little Of That Sweet

Filed under Broken Communication, Divorce, Houseword, Housework, Marriage, Relationships, Vacation Time